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bobdina
05-19-2010, 10:06 PM
Horrors of war drove VC holder to try to kill himself
Lance Corporal Johnson Beharry

(Ben Gurr/The Times)

Lance Corporal Beharry felt so depressed that he drove his car into a lamppost at 100mph
Laura Pitel



The most highly decorated solidier in the British armed forces tried to kill himself after returning from Iraq.

Lance Corporal Johnson Beharry, who was awarded the Victoria Cross in 2005 for twice saving the lives of fellow soldiers, felt so depressed that he drove his car into a lamppost at 100mph.

Lance Corporal Beharry, of 1st Battalion, Princess of Wales Regiment, made the suicide attempt after an early-morning row with his partner.

“I was really down and depressed,” he told The Sun. “I was around my house with my missus when I mentioned that I sometimes thought I should kill myself. She started crying and arguing with me. After a few minutes I just stormed out the house.”


He got into his black Lexus, bought with the proceeds of his memoirs, and drove into the night.

“I was as angry as I’d ever been,” he said. “I drove up the hill thinking, ‘This is too much. I can’t deal with this.’ I couldn’t go through life not knowing what to expect. I’m always in physical pain, my back never stops hurting and driving faster seemed like a good way to numb it.”

He started speeding down the winding Champion Hill in Dulwich, South London, at 100mph. Driving down the middle of the road, with cars swerving to avoid him, he felt a “surge of pain” before ploughing his car into a lamppost.

He was taken to hospital after the crash, which took place in December 2008, but was not seriously injured.

Lance Corporal Beharry called on David Cameron and Liam Fox, the new Defence Minister, to provide for more help to solidiers returning from war zones. “Everyone thinks I’m a hero because I was awarded a VC, but I’m just a normal soldier who can’t get away from his demons,” he said. “And if it can happen to me it must be happening to thousands of of soldiers who are suffering and need help.

“Help and care needs to be ongoing and available to everyone who served on the battlefield. My message to other soliders feeling like this would be to talk to each other. If you keep it in until it blows up you could do something you regret - just like me.”

Lance Corporal Beharry said that he finds it hard to distract himself from his memories of war. “During the daytime I can keep busy to keep away the demons, but at night when I’m alone with my thoughts my mind drifts back to my friends being blown up and all those I left behind,” he said. “I can’t get away from it.

“The minute I close my eyes I start sweating and seeing the faces of my dead friends. This is what makes me think, ‘What is the point of me being alive when I’m surrering like this?’”
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/uk/article7128503.ece